Hello Scribblers. Another week has flow by. Over the last few days, I’ve thought a lot about people from my past. Friends who at a time in my life were important to me. They helped me in so many ways, then over time we lost touch, they moved away, or of course, they passed on. This is how I define an absent friend and they play a big role in our lives, or at least they do in mine.
It’s funny in a way, when I think of certain friends I smile or I remember something crazy stupid we might have done. I have a laugh then I get nostalgic. I wonder what happened? What changed? Was it a fight? Was it something that was said or done? Was it life? What would they say or do now if they were still with us. Was there something that I could have done or said to ensure they were still here? For whatever reason life changed, we grew apart and then they were gone.
At this moment, I can think of at least five absent friends who I remember and miss on a regular bases. They showed me and taught me things that I know I would have never learned otherwise. Some of it good and some of it not.
I morn these losses.
I, also, celebrate these times.
I celebrate because of what I learned from these people. Whether I learned more about life and how to live it, myself and how people see me and how I see myself, or about the world in general, not everyone has the same history or background so what might make perfect sense to me and be a ‘no brainer’ is in fact difficult and not as intuitive for others. These were important lessons and by extension those that taught them to me are important. So, I wonder what happen to them. What they are doing now. Where they are. How they are getting along. Who they are with. Are they happy. Are they looking down from above? Do they think back fondly on the time we were friends or do I not even get a passing thought? It’s interesting to think about.
Assuming they are alive, you would think finding them and being able to check in on them would be easy given the prevalence of Social Media these days, but even with that, not everyone is on social media and not everyone wants to be found. Some of these people, who for whatever reason affected us greatly have even gone so far as to ensure we can’t find them. Which is fine, they have to take care of themselves. I know, for myself, I’m sure there are people out there who think I was a terrible friend. Heck, I could even be the villain of their story. And I’ve come to peace with that.
What others think of you is none of your business.
Still, I’d like to think that they learned as much from me as I’ve learned from them, but maybe not. There is no rule that says education has to be a two-way street.
Still, these people, these wonderful individuals where important to me and I find, at times, that I miss them and I wonder about them. I hope they are happy and healthy. For those that have moved on from this world I hope they are watching down on us and continue to check in.
Absent friends don’t have to be looked back on in a negative manner, because even the worst of them taught us something and for that we should be grateful. Painful lessons are often the best teachers for us. I think I’ve learned more from being hurt by friends than any other way. Being taken advantage of, being lied to, being physically hurt and being emotionally traumatized are all powerful tools. They suck, and are terrible, but you learn and it is doubtful you will ever have to go through that again.
Lessons are what life is all about. We learn. We grow. We move forward. At least that is the hope. And absent friends, as well as friends, are there to help teach us these lessons making us who we are now… hopefully that is someone better than we were before.
Let’s all be better. Let’s take the lessons we’ve learned from friends and absent friends to heart so their lessons were not in vain.
That is all for now, my lovely Scribblers. What about you? Do you have absent friends who have taught you a great deal, but for one reason or another are now gone from your life? Share your stories below. Please remember to drop me a heart/like letting me know you stopped by. If you want to help support me and my writing efforts please consider sharing this post on your social media platforms to help keep the conversation going. Until next time I hope you stay safe and have a great week.